Sunday, January 1, 2012

I'm so excited about what this year holds...well, hopefully!   One thing I've STARTED learning over the past year, is to let go of my expectations  and let God have His way.  I'm learning that I can have a plan...but, that doesn't mean it will happen.

2011 was a LONG year!   It had it's ups and downs.   We were into our adoption process, thinking the kids should be home in September. we are in January and they are not home...but, I'm actually ok with that...most days.  I know God is in control and He's given us  such a peace. But, I wouldn't be being completely honest if I didn't say that there are those days that I just scream because I can't stand the waiting and uncertainty anymore.  I'm thankful that my Savior is gracious and patient.   I'm thankful for what He has brought us through and the ways He has blessed us.  Here's a brief overview of our year:

*Chad got to take a trip to Ghana to meet our children.
*Adoptions in Ghana were threatened to be stopped.  
*We were blessed countless times by people's generosity...sometimes from strangers.  God has taught us    that He will provide if we obey.
*In August, my car broke down and the repair was beyond our means.
* Chad got a job promotion!!!!
* We found out I was pregnant!!!  We went from shock to sheer joy!
*At our first doctors appt. we found out that we would probably lose our baby.  After fighting for and praying for our baby for a few weeks, we did lose her/him.  
* Chad broke his foot and his job wouldn't allow him to come back to work until he was 100%  We wondered what God was thinking!!!!
*MY mom was selling everything to move to Africa for 9 months and she stayed with us for 3 weeks.
*After almost losing my life, it was discovered that I was actually carrying twins and one was tubal and had ruptured.  Another huge loss.  Another huge testimony of God's mom was there to rush me  to the hospital when this happened...otherwise I probably would have stayed at home with Chad (and his broken foot) and the boys...and bled to death.   
*We had a huge outpouring from our church and lifegroup.   We were handed a huge sum of money, our pantry was stocked, meals were brought daily for weeks, and our house had been cleaned when I got out of the hospital.
*In October my mom left for 9 months!  This was really hard on all of the grandkids...but, she is with her other two grandkids! 
*November 8th we finally passed court and the kids are legally ours!
*I got to go to Ghana for 2 weeks since Chad is off work anyways! :)   
*In December we were blown away when a friend handed us an $800 check for our adoption...just the amount needed for our visa fees!
*Thinking we would now be moving very quickly toward bringing our kids home, new developments are discouraging and it make take longer than we thought.

As is the case with several events in my life...I would never ask to go through some of the things we have been through...but, I wouldn't go back and change a thing.  I've learned so much.   I've gotten to experience the "peace that passes all understanding".   I've had comfort while experiencing the greatest pain of my life.   I've seen God's hand at work in the details of my life.  He has shown us His love like never is breathtaking...extravagant.   He lavishes it on us freely.   My prayer for this year is that our family would have roots that go down deep and that we would truly know the depths of His love.   I pray we would not keep that love to ourselves, but learn to love others the way He loves us....sacrificially, with grace, with my whole heart and selflessly.    I struggle with all of these on a daily basis!  I want "me time".  I want to hold grudges.  I want to be comfortable.  When I look at how He has adopted me into His family....when I am so undeserving...I have to seek this with my whole heart!

Ephesians 3:14-19
For this reason I kneel before the Father, 15from whom his whole familya in heaven and on earth derives its name. 16I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

1 comment:

Brandi said...

So very beautifully written...loved it.