Joy is something that I struggle with. It's something I'm praying about and seeking God for. I don't understand why it's a struggle for me. I wonder if ...maybe...sometimes I just compare myself to others who have a different personality and think that there must be something wrong with me. I don't know. I do know that lately my days seem to be slipping by too quickly. There are moments I'm missing because my mind and heart are fixed on things that are ultimately unimportant. Maybe joy isn't the FEELING I'm waiting for? I look around me and I really am so thankful. I don't deserve what I've been given. Though I mess up, really bad, most (every) days...I am so aware of the amazing grace being freely given to me. There are days I feel lonely or unloved....but, then feel His arms around me. I am uncertain about so many things in my life right now...but, I know who holds my future. So, maybe I don't struggle with joy? Maybe that is joy.